A Gen X STORY: Navigating the choppy waters of dating in your 40's.
When I turned 38 several years ago, I made a decision to stick on that number for the foreseeable future, LOL. I loved turning 38, it was a great year for me! My 38th year was awesome because I finally came into myself. I learned I genuinely liked who I was and the person I was becoming. It was then I declared without arrogance or conceit, "you're a total bad ass Ronnie!" Now that I have passed the threshold of 40, I find myself in territory I never "planned" to be in... living single in my 40's - YIKES! Ok, ok I am being a tiny bit dramatic here. I mean after all nobody's life or death is contingent upon the success of my dating life hahaha. The dating waters in your 40's however are quite interesting. I’m sure fellow single Gen X'ers can attest to this because we have a point of reference of a time before smart technology and hand held devices. When we first started dating, there was this now ancient ritual called interpersonal communication. I can still remember the good old days when we would actually talk to each other. We would talk so much; sometimes we would fall asleep on the house phone! Today it's all about texting, dm, im etc. If you’re 40 or more you may also recall a time long ago in a land far, far away of this thing called romance & courtship. I am starting to wonder if romancing/courting a woman has been shelved like old school hip-hop. Remember that old school goodness which quickly became the soundtrack of our angst filled youth?
Has the process of getting to know someone been replaced by an all flash and no substance equivalent of today's hip-hop performers? We get no storyline, just a mind numbing repetitive hook. Sure one can adapt and adjust based on the times, but why should we? Speaking from a woman's perspective, it can be even more challenging in our 40's. Settling for less than we deserve for many women increases because we were consciously/unconsciously taught by our baby boomer parents that happiness is tied to marriage. We all know that notion is a total load of poppycock! For those of you who are about to embark on this single while 40 plus journey, I’m not going to lie to you; the waters are indeed choppy out here but I’m more hopeful than I’ve ever been in my entire adult life! Despite the choppy waters I do want to encourage you to keep swimming and don't climb into the first boat that comes along. If you believe “your guy – your girl” is out there, the universe will respond to that energy. In the meantime find joy in all of it.
Veronica Lifestyle Guru